BEWARE: disturbing content

We live in a basement apartment so it's only natural that every so often we see a weird creepy crawly. It's become second nature for me to put my "spidey eyes" on whenever we walk into our apartment after being away for awhile. I scope out the place before we settle in each night and I'd say I typically spot one every two to three days on average. They have only been along the baseboards or just on the floor so I guess you could say I was doing alright.

Until just a few nights ago.

We walked in the door that evening after watching America's Ninja Warrior at my parents house. I scoped out the baseboards as I walked through our hallway doing my routine check. Sure enough, there was a dark speck I didn't recognize (I've memorized the placement of every speck in our berber carpet) so I squished it with my shoe with satisfaction knowing I wouldn't being seeing another one for at least two more days. Gag.

We were sitting on the sofa together reading before we went to bed when I spotted another spider a little way up on the wall this time, hiding out behind a chair we have cornered next to our TV. I told Robert to kill it and he said he would...however, he didn't stand up to do it right away. Now don't get me wrong, I love my husband, but there is absolutely NO time for hesitation when there is a spider in the same room as me. My blood was beginning to thicken and the seconds were beginning to feel like hours. Those things must be killed right away! Spiders somehow manage to sense when they've been spotted by a human and they hurry off to hide somewhere else in your home so before it's too late you've lost the spider! And that....that torment is just too much. I abruptly stood up and exclaimed, "Fine! I'll do it myself! But I'm not squishing it!!" as I glared at him.

I went to the cabinet under the sink and retrieved a spider spray that has been there since we moved in. I immediately sprayed it on the little nasty guy but that feeling of satisfaction I usually get, that "everything's going to be fine now" feeling lasted but a brief moment. Two giant spiders, in addition to the one I sprayed, scurried in opposite directions as the nasty one fell to the ground.

I screamed in horror and ran away into the kitchen. I literally had a panic attack. Those things were huge and they scared the crap out of me! And I blamed Robert for the fear that was now over taking my body. "Robert!! Kill them!!" I screamed obnoxiously. Kill them he did and then he spent a lot of time calming and comforting me, but it was no use. I hit my breaking point. I was determined to KILL every single spider in our apartment. And I wanted to watch each one die a slow painful death so I lay in bed that night plotting my revenge.

I couldn't sleep though. The thought of the spiders dying didn't comfort me. I was terribly traumatized and my vivid imagination was not helping. In the dark, it looked like spiders were crawling on Robert's skin, it sounded like a million spiders were crawling out from every picture we had on the wall, the fan was blowing tiny hairs on my arms, neck and face that made me shiver with fear. I finally threw off the covers and decided to take my iPod into the bathroom to sit on the toliet until I got a grip on myself.

Facebook was a great distraction until I looked up and saw a disgustingly huge brown centipede coming toward me. Really? Really?! I think I actually said that out loud. On this night of all nights?! I dry heaved in my mouth as I felt the splat of it's long body underneath the wasted wad of tissue. WHERE DO THESE THINGS COME FROM?! Our place isn't even that big! There are only two windows. One door to the outside. Nearly every corner is visible....I just can't wrap my head around it.

Needless to say, the second Robert left for work the next morning I began the extermination. I dusted, swept, vaccuumed and sprayed every inch of our place. Every inch. Including the windows and baseboards. I even ended up reorganizing the closet, reorganizing underneath our bed and moving all the large pieces of furniture out away from the wall so I could make sure there were no little creepy crawlies hiding there too.

When Robert returned home I felt a deep feeling of accomplishment and our home never looked and smelled so good. I have since then found only 1 spider (tiny) and a little beetle, both already dead along the baseboards in the hallway. I smile knowing that the mysterious spider repellant and killer actually works. Now, I'm just hoping I don't have to do another extermination for a little while.